im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
