I think scott just propositioned me for sex
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
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