You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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