the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
