i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
