Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
