you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Randomize
