Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Less talking, more tequila
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
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