dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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