I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
