I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize