Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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