What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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