The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
