I cannot find my penis.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
operation have a gay friend backfired
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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