the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
