unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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