Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
