Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
