I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
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