i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
