Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Randomize
