I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
My life is pants optional.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
