He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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