Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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