I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize