just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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