Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
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