Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
its not stalking. its research.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
