margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Randomize
