Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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