Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize