the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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