Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
