Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
