Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
