is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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