he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
