I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
You pole danced in your parka.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
