Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize