what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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