Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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