I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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