I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
