I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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