my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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