yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I wish I only lived at night.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
