I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize