is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
