I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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