Dual....:-)
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
